By midday, that "missing" feeling didn't feel so sweet -- I felt lonesome.  I *just happened* to pick up an interview with John Bandler in which he said that you don't have an inner resource if you're not using it.    Good timing on the reminder, John, since I have all these tools at my disposal that I use with other people every day, and yet still just plum forget to use them on my own gunk.

One of the resources that I use to generate good-feeling is anchoring, which uses deliberately set or accessed neurological connections between everyday actions and positive emotions, like how hearing a baby laughing just automatically has you feeling warm and fuzzy.   But when I'm feeling in an actively negative state, like lonesomeness, sometimes it's too far a leap from feeling bad to feeling good, and the anchor becomes murkied -- it "collapses" and decreases in effectiveness.  (Not a problem, by the way -- you can always rebuild your positive anchor even more powerfully by simply repeating the steps.)   At such times, it helps to have another superpower handy.  

One such superpower -- the ability to move out of an actively negative feeling directly into an active and delightful good feeling -- is called "Spinning," and that's what I used yesterday to move out of my gunk funk.   I'd like to share this process of active imagination with you and invite you to use it whenever you are feeling some way you'd prefer not to feel, and would like to transform that into something that works better.  

1. Direct your attention to your body.  Notice and acknowledge the emotional and physical sensations.  What is there to learn from this?  Get what there is to get about the negative emotion.  

What there was for me to get was that I prefer having Danger Man and Danger Boy close by, because I love them so much, and that their being in the Other California doesn't diminish that love.  I had been focusing on what I get from them that I would miss, and I forgot to focus on how generous I can be and what I'm Generating.  (Hey, I just noticed that "generating" and "generous" have the same root!)   Just seeing that my love is here, no matter where the Danger Guys are, has that old lonesomeness beginning to drift away.....

2. Observe the feeling in your body.  Where does it start, and where does it go?  Bad feelings tend to cycle and loop; just watch the loop for a moment.  

"Lonesomeness" began in my stomach, as if I'd eaten some bad sushi, went to the small of my back and moved heavily upwards through my chest, restricting my breathing, and then moved up the back of my shoulders and down my arms, and then back up my arms and down the front of me and back into my tum, where it looped back up again.   (Oops, the thing about remembering this is that I'm doing the problem and feeling the lonesomeness as I do it -- dagnabbed mind/body connection! -- good motivation to finish writing and feeling this quickly and get to feeling great again!)   It sounds kind of funny to experience your emotion as a physical sensation, doesn't it?  And the more you practice noticing that you feel your emotions inside your body, the more powerful and effective you can be in feeling good on purpose, physically AND emotionally.  

3. Push. Use your imagination to push the loop out in front of your body, and notice it spinning actual-size there.  At what rate is it spinning?   What color is it?   

My loop was moving very sluggishly and slowly, and was the dull yellow color of the very syrupy pinot grigio I'd had the night before (and which probably contributed to my low feelings.)   

4. Reverse. Change the direction of the loop.  Slow the spinning to a stop and then reverse the direction, or envision the loop flipping over if you need to so that it spins the other way.   As you watch it spinning in the other direction, does the color change on its own?  It often will do just that, and if it doesn't, you may want to deliberately change it to a hue that delights you.  

My syrupy yellowish color became a clear, sparkling bluish-white, like a clean, pristine waterfall on a tropical island. 

5. Pull the loop back into your body.   Does that new, nice looping feelings grow larger in your body?   Does it change the way you hold your body up nice and tall, as instead of burdening you, the loop now supports you?   Does it have a new name now?  

That old lonesomeness I used to feel is gone, and in it's place is something I'd call "Clarity" -- the feeling of cool bouyancy and a clearer line of sight, as if my eyes have been washed and my vision is brighter.   

6. Allow the spinning of this new, good feeling to expand and flow at a rate that feels wonderful inside your body.  Allow it to massage your body and your mind, and notice how great it feels to be in charge of how you feel.   Nice, huh?   

Spinning works really well for turning nervousness into excitement, transforming irritation into calm, motivating yourself, and moving out of hurt and into compassion.  It's also great for enhancing and intensifying good feelings!   Instead of reversing the direction of positive emotion loops, make them go just a little bit faster or slower, and add saturation or brightness to the colors; experiment a bit with the loop so that the feeling in your body is most desirable and most enjoyable.  

*I say that facetiously, because there are no accidents -- at least that's what my boyfriend told me when he spilled an entire bottle of beer on me.